The New Normal - Evading Contact Tracers

I listened to Cindy's pathetic announcement today. I have three pieces of advice. 1. Do not sign in. 2. Make restaurant reservations under people you dislike. 3. Cash is king, pay cash, no credit card no contact tracing. Oh and ........... 4. Jacinda as much as I do not like you and your politics. Nice hospital pass being powerful enough to shut the country down to avoid the wedding. CLARKE IS NOWHERE NEAR GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!!! COME ONNNNNNNNNNN. KEEEEEEEEP RUNNING!!!!!!!

One Bows To The Knight Of Jones

I am infrequently told by men I have a massive ego.  For a bird. As a woman I hasten to add this cannot and can never be a bad thing. As a gender we are always placing ourselves second so I pony myself up to put one first. Why the fuck not? I mean I was just a child when Mai Chen, Sian Elias and Michelle Boag were apparently women of excellence us women twenty years younger were meant to aspire to in the political and legal world. Jesus. Fucking. Wept. The chap at O'Rorke Hall dishing out the fish and chips on a Friday night when I was 18 years old was more impressive to me in my life than the above, I will however offer up a moment when one has been outplayed by an act of excellence. By someone else. I posted this. I bow down to this. Amazing. ENDS Sir Robert Jones who has more money than a bull could ever shit has just posted the words "world class cock". I cannot stop laughing.

Tova O'Brien Insults The Skill And Professionalism Of Barmen

  Parkhill said O’Brien “can't work anywhere other than a bar. Tova can’t see, and I can’t see, how that’s going to benefit Jenna”. As someone who knows more than their fair share of staff in restaurants and bars I submit O'Brien could never be a barman/woman after the career she has had to date. Who the hell would trust her with anything while drinking? Imagine the chat? She is a nasty conniving bitch. Journalism, okay.  Someone to have a casual drink around?  To invite friends and new friends to be around? You are fucking joking. When her new job fails miserably in the ratings I do have an idea however based in bars.  She could model herself on the hit Australian lesbian stylist Tabatha Coffey who used to go around trashy hair salons in America terrorising the staff, recording it and making them into profitable businesses.  The latter part would be a struggle for Tova but the terrorisation she already has down pat. "Tova Takes Over".

The New Selfish - Mummy Covid Doomists

For years the political right has been associated with selfishness. It’s a tag worn with honour given those shilling for unions and other left wing degenerates. We are all used to it. Water off a duck's back. Left nice and cuddly, right bad and nasty. It’s a narrative that needs to change.  Covid in New Zealand has spawned a new definition of selfish. Because the whole idea of selfish is putting your needs ahead of the vast majority. Surely? Something I never thought we would find in our lifetime is that the tables are well turned. Selfish is now found online by everyone who even after 92.6% of the country is double vaccinated and the booster is freely available, thinks this justifies more lockdowns. I say we need to fight back.  Any means possible sort of stuff by now.  No more lockdowns.  No more level 3.  No more MIQ and border closures.  There is nothing more selfish than demanding healthy able people close their businesses, stop going to work, bars, restaurants, churches and t

My MIQ Sort Of Haiku

Having endured this hell it has taken a long time for me to be able to put the experience into words. May. Hipkins says book now.  Done. July. Vaccinate. Save the world.  Hangover headache. Brutal shot. Come back 3 months. Jab. All good. Done my piece.  Saved the frickin vulnerable in the world. Done. Stick up nose. No worries. Pass. Fly for hours. 32. There’s no flight direct. Must get flight. Had great time on flights. Booked a suite. Endless champagne. Fun times. I enter the country. Kia Ora Mofos. I am back. I cannot touch my bags. Where are the bags? Smuggled in cigars.  Should have got more. We are on a bus.  Airport hotel.  Thank god. Military read out a card. They can barely read 1am. Giggle. Police with tasers circle. More Police than I will see in months in the CBD of Auckland. Army and Navy all chubsters by now. I see the fence. It’s not high. I see my bags. They’re 43kgs in total. I’m getting over the fence. No worries. The bags aren’t. Hard lift. I phone at 4pm daily to ea

No Way Ardern Is Opening The Border MIQ Free In February

The New Zealand passport may be great for travelling the world but it has to currently be among the worst rated because it is useless on its own to get into your own country! Labour cancelled homecomings until February for returning New Zealanders hoping to go into home isolation. Rightly and most definitely wrongly, there is no need for any review of the possible home isolation for returnees from Australia to New Zealand at the end of February. There will be no review.  It just is not happening folks. We are marooned in a deep red sea of cowardice. New Zealand has an unofficial strategy right now that will continue - to suppress Delta until it is close to zero and to keep out Omicron as long as possible . All madness.   But I am just telling you the truth. It would be more conservative to allow Chinese tourists in than anyone from Australia currently given the strategy so obvious right now! Instead of giving out false hope, Labour need to stop teasing the hearts and minds of returning

"Significant Heat" A Surprise At This Time Of Year

  "Drink plenty of water, stay out of the sun and avoid extreme physical exertion". What do they want next, another lockdown to save us? It is called SUMMER you fools. It is about bloody time it arrived. And it is AWESOME.